shit + money

i've had two shitty days in a row and i desperately need money
and i desperately need drugs and i can't sleep at night
and i don't know if i turned into something im not, 'cause i've been crying much more than i used to.
and i scream and yell much more as well. not when anybodys around though.
i've been listening to lou reed all day, because his voice is nice.
i like john frusciante as well but he isn't nice in the same way. he makes me sad but also happy.
it's kind of confusing when something makes you feel two different feelings at the same time.
but i guess it's okay, it's fine really. i just.. i don't know. i ran out of words.



-n